Derby Carlson
Contributing Writer
Our 2nd Reading Day is upon us, y’all! *Throws confetti into the air because we all really need a break* And, if you are like me, you probably have no plans on how to spend it. Well, lucky duck, I have a list of 10 — that’s right TEN — things you could do during our condensed spring break.
1: Send your professor some playful hate mail at 3 am the night before which says,
“Dear Professor, it seems that you are not aware that tomorrow is the students’ respite day. Well, luckily for you, I am here to inform you that it does indeed exist. According to the Merriam-Webster dictionary, the term respite means, “an interval of rest or relief.” So, I will not — I repeat NOT — be doing those extra readings that you assigned our class because I can guarantee you that I will not be getting any rest doing so. Hugs and kiss my butt, Me.”
2: Reply to any cstudent announcement and say, “Hey, wassup, howdy, hello, hi, WYD, etc. Can someone tell me what’s for lunch today?? I can’t interpret Chef Rick’s spreadsheet. Frowny face.” Writing out ‘frowny face is very important. People must understand that you mean serious business.
Interpret Chef Rick’s spreadsheet. Log onto Canva. Make a poster that says all the different foods offered for that day. (For some reason, it looks very similar to the poster that Chef Rick used to send out. Oh well.) Send poster to @/cstudent. Be treated as God walking amongst mere mortals.
3: Go watch and donate to Hola’s soccer tournament! (It’s for charity y’all.)
4: Go get your COVID vaccine. Make it a girls’ trip– nothing like bonding over a global pandemic!!! (If you already have… here’s a hug. )
5: Go to Clurg with your closest friends that like food. Text your other friends and acquaintances that you are about to host a food eating competition on the porch of Clurg and want an audience present. They all come and watch in amazement and disgust as you and your friends scarf down 8+ pieces of Clurg Pizza in a minute. (How did you do it?? All that dough. *shudders*)
6: Go comment on a Sewanee Purple article. Start a massive debate over whether or not pineapple should be on pizza. (Which has nothing to do with the original article.) Go crazy. AHHHH. Go stupid. AHHHH.
7: Register a trip to the beach as a therapy appointment if you have your COVID shot. Drive to Flora-Bama in three hours. If the cops try to say you’re speeding, tell them that you have to cram your spring break into one day. Get to the beach. Sunbathe for 15 mins, swim for 15 mins, and cry when you stuff your salty body back into your car. Get back to Sewanee before nightfall.
If you don’t have your COVID shot, go to Cheston. Or, if you’re wanting some real luxury travel, bully your local Chi Psis to raft you over to Trez. Ahhh, relaxing.
8: Since it is supposed to rain, go outside and finally become the storm chaser that you’ve always wanted to be. You must allow one of your enemies to film yourself talking about the weather while you both drown in the pouring rain.
9: Go to All Saints. Pray to a higher-being of your choice/put it out into the universe that the next respite day you have no work.
10: Sleep until 2 pm. Wake up in a panic because OH MY GOD I AM LATE TO MY 8 AM!!1! Pause, take a deep breath, and realize after you have half a sock on that… No, there are no classes today! Faceplant back into your bed. Rest up, because you probably have an exam tomorrow.