Just keep calm, it’s only reply all

Email
One of the emails in question.

By Bess Pearson

Staff Writer

Ah, the reply all function. Is there nothing more glorious than opening your inbox only to find twenty emails that combine both back and forth conversation (having nothing to do with you) and all-caps angry individuals who spent fifteen minutes of their precious time (time they claim you wasted with your “reply all”) scouring the abyss that is Tumblr in search of a GIF to try and shame your honest mistake or intentional curiosity. Alas, their meager attempts at humor fall so, so incredibly short that you resort to not a chuckle but rather a sigh of pity.

If “reply all” were an Instagram picture I would not double tap, but I would also not take the time to express my anger via an all-caps comment “WHY DO YOU EXIST” or “WHY AM I SEEING THIS?!?!” consequently linking you to my #f4f #tagsforlikes picture (using the Lo-Fi filter because I am classy like that) demonizing your bold use of the reply all option.

If you’re confused, I promise that I am crazy, but not so crazy as to pull this problem out of the blue. I am instead referring to a string of Order of the Gownsman emails that, for some odd reason, enraged many Sewanee students.

Now, I’m not here to call out those who were angry about receiving the emails and wanted e-v-e-r-y-o-n-e to know…but instead here to offer some reason and consolation so that the next time you desire to declare war on fellow emailers, you will perhaps not.

If you are wondering why you received the Order of the Gownsman emails, maybe you should have read the email. At the bottom of each email it said explicitly:

I think that perhaps one of the most amazing things about emails is that you can delete them. Not only can you delete them, you can delete them before you read them, and you can also delete more than one at a time! Boy, and we thought iPhones were the best thing since sliced bread.

Furthermore, you are able to unsubscribe from the group so you don’t ever receive their emails again. Yes, that means you don’t even have to bother locating the little trashcan because you won’t even receive the emails to begin with! God bless you Bill Gates or Al Gore or whoever created the Internet.

Technology is cool and so is keeping your cool. Next time someone replys all to an email let’s just stick to live tweeting (I guarantee it will be trending before you know it).

 

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